That one time I almost died

It’s the MOST wonderful time of the year!

With the kids jingle-belling, and everyone telling you…

It’s butt-sledding season!!

Friends, the temperatures have dropped and the snow has fallen and so on those beloved mountains and hills of mine and yours sits a bed of sweet sweet powder just waiting patiently for cheeks on sleds to swish-swhisshhhhh all the way down.

It’s one of my most favorite winter activities, second to sitting in jammies sipping warm beverages. Yes, the hike up a mountain or hill in the snow is blissfully serene. Yes, the views of snow covered valleys as far as they eye can see are *chef’s kiss*.

But, it’s the trip back down that makes this little excursion that you’re on an adventure.

In a March blog post I covered some helpful tips to ensuring a safe, respectful, and blissful sledding shesh:

  • Gather your gear
  • Find your trail
  • Hit it!

If you spent any amount of time as a child in a cold weather climate you know how to sled down a hill. Your mom bundled you up, drove you to your spot and turned you loose. You careened, arms and legs flailing in attempt to steer, over ice patches, into your younger, lighter and slower sister. Tired from belly laughs and thrills, you then dragged yourself and your sled back up the hill to do it all over again.

Sledding down a mountain is nothing like this so please refer to my previous post. And then come back for this addendum to that post, a little tale of how I almost died sledding down the most epic run on planet Earth plus a few disclaimers so that you can be fully educated when you make the same bad choices.

Let’s talk about Marble Mountain.

On Valentine’s Day of 2021, Mark and I chose to hike to the top of the mountain we were married on in 2019, Whiteface Mountain. Although home to a weather observation tower and a road that brings visitors to the top in a more conventional way, it is a breathtaking mountain with views of Lake Placid and beyond.

For Winter Olympics fans, Whiteface was also used in events for the ‘32 and ‘80 games.

To get to Whiteface Mountain the unconventional way many hikers start on a trail that first takes you up and over Marble Mountain, which still bears the cement footings of an old chair lift to now extinct ski runs. As a path cut into the mountain for a purpose, the trail heads straight up, no serpentine for erosion- or quad-sake, straight up. For 3/4 of a mile you climb. And climb and climb. No breaks, no turns. Just up.

Naturally, what goes up must…

Careen down with wild abandon.

After a long and wind-blown trek to our spot-of-love, and after huddling in a tiny snow filled shack to warm up on hot soup from our thermoses, a little leg break was much needed.

A little time to sit and let the world pass us by, to let the distance to the car draw near as we enjoyed a peaceful meander through the woods.

But that’s not how it happened.

It’s a steep trail from the bottom to the top. A few sections off Whiteface might have been considered “peaceful” and “meandering,” but we were mostly sledding for our lives until we reached the top of Marble Mountain. From there it was straight and fast with nothing but the end of the trail to slow us down.

Ladies first, obviously…so that Mark could watch and record.

To be honest, I was nervous. I had absolutely no protection against the things that could go wrong; mainly, against the the trees and the concrete footings that would most definitely mangle my body.

But the show must go on, and I was cold and wet and wanted desperately to be back at the car.

I sat on my sled, grabbed its handle and let gravity take over.

With zero resistance from twists and turns and loose snow gravity had its way with me. I slid and I slid FAST down that mountain, making it about halfway before I realized I was going at least 100mph*.

*I was not, in fact, going 100mph. It was 110mph. J/k, it was probably just 25mph but boy does that feel fast when you’re careening with wild abandon.

At this realization I bailed. I panicked and I bailed because I knew I was going way too fast to survive hitting an object in my way. I picked a nice open spot, free of immovable death traps and threw myself ass over teakettle into a full blown tumble.

I tumbled on the hard-packed trail and then I tumbled into the soft wet snow bank. I covered a lot of distance in my tumble and had the snow caked everything to prove it. Snow was in my boots, in my hat, in my pockets, in my mouth. But I was alive. And I was hysterical with glee. Adrenaline covers up a lot rational fears. Like, should I really attempt to continue to sled down the rest of this hill that I was once afraid of dying on YES I SHOULD THANKS FOR ASKING.

And so I did, with less fear and less bailing; making it to the bottom where I was greeted by a dog.

Of course, Mark watched, recorded and learned from my bail, and so he gave himself a smoother, less snow-caked ride down. He also greeted the dog before we limped the last mile to the car.

I shouldn’t need to tell you at this point that butt-sledding down mountains is extremely dangerous. But I will anyway.

Disclaimer

If you are hiking in the winter, you will most definitely have micro-spikes (for the icy spots) and snowshoes (required in some areas but also generally a good idea). These items are spikey and can easily get caught on rocks, branches and snow, sending you ass over teakettle toward things that can impale you or worse.

Worse being falling off a cliff. Even the baby hills can have big drop offs with mystery dangers at the bottom.

And this leads to danger for the rescuers. Rangers aren’t always able to be air lifted and dropped on the scene of your misadventure; they hike the same hike, in the same conditions and risk the same dangers.

So keep that in mind when you’re placing your buns on sled.

Make good choices.

BONUS: I really almost died on Giant Mountain.

This is another steep climb that wears on the legs but offers great sledding on the way down; however the conditions for swooshing at the top are vastly different than those toward the bottom. The beautiful powder turns to pure ice and that is where our story begins.

Picture this: Stacie, out of her weary mind, cocky from successful runs at the top of the mountain, steps up to her sled and takes off on a section of the trail that is icy and curvy, full of boulders and downed tree limbs.

Mark does not. He is still in possession of the sense God gave him.

Stacie careens. Out of control.

Around curves.

Over boulders.

Up and over the trail and down a creek embankment.

Rolling and rolling down.

My trip down Marble Mountain was dangerous, but I would do it again because I still felt like I had control.

My trip down the bottom of Giant Mountain was dumb in addition to dangerous. I had no control on the ice and it was pure luck that I wasn’t seriously injured. I learned a lesson that day so you don’t have to. Have fun but be safe, friends!

Midnight hiking

When I was a wee-babe of 11 my fifth grade class went on a weeklong field trip to Camp Hi Hill in the Angeles National Forest; cabins, bunk beds, KP duty, it was everything you saw in Parent Trap minus the twin sister. My city school district owned a camp and every year would ship city kids off to have a little slice of nature. Among the many, many, memories I still carry with me, like my crusty beech counselor and her obsession with shaving her legs, was the most exhilarating yet totally inappropriate activity for children: the night walk.

Picture this: the mountains of Los Angeles, at night, in the dark. Our counselors take us to a trail and we are instructed to turn off our flash lights and walk a half mile of the trail, alone, to a counselor at the other end.

In the dark.

It was both terrifying and exciting, and I had ZERO hesitations despite the obvious fact that serial killers live and thrive in all dark places.

Mom, I survived. Calm down.

But this little adventure now lives in my brain and lingers in that area that pushes me to say ”YES!” to terrifying, exciting, and dumb ideas. Like running a marathon after just running a marathon, or baking Mario and Sonic cakes for my nephews’ birthdays.

Kids are serious about their cakes.

So last week when Mark said ”let’s do a sunrise hike!” I did not even have to agree. It is an unspoken rule that I am ON BOARD for a challenge. Then he said ”let’s hike Wright Mountain!” and I just kept packing my damn bag.

For context:

Sunrise hike: what to expect

Option 1: pack a sleeping bag, drive to the trail the night before and nap in your car. Wake up with enough time to strap on your shoes and your pack before hitting the trail.

Option 2: book a bunk at a local hostel, sleep commune style with strangers, hope for the best. Wake up with enough time to drive the short distance to your trail.

Option 3: sleep in your comfortable bed. Wake up and drive for hours in the middle of the night to the trail. Pass the cool kids who are heading home from a night on the town.

Headlamps. You’ll need headlamps. And Mark asked that I instruct you to make sure you pack extra batteries because hypothetically speaking if your headlamp did not function properly that would be bad.

Wright Mountain: what to expect

An Adirondack High Peak; over 4,000 feet, with 2,800+ elevation gain.

Windy. So windy. Nearly blew me off the peak the last time we hiked.

Not sure why anyone would choose to go here.

Cool plane crash just off the summit.

Beautiful summit, tho!

And so, after running 6 miles Saturday morning and doing chores all day, we decided on option 3 and settled into a nice comfortable bed for a hot second before waking up and rushing out the door with gear and snacks at midnight.

Oh but it wouldn’t be a true Agostino adventure without a touch of mayhem.

Picture this: the last potty break for our dogs just before we left. Also the last potty break for, Lucy, a neighbor dog. Mid-pee, my two realized they were not alone, and so they darted across the road, dragging me in my sandals, then after I fell, dragging my full body across their lawn. Dog fight ensued. At midnight. With me still attached to the end of the leashes.

Everyone was fine.

Annoyed. Furious. But fine.

And then it was off we go!

Fortunately, no more hiccups. Just driving and chatting, and dancing to House of Pain. After that, hiking and cursing and completely missing the sunrise.

Our legs were tired. Our entire bodies were tired. The climb took so much more out of us than we expected and we made it to the mountain in the full light of day.

Did I mention it was cold?! Like, 13 degree wind chill, cold??

(We wouldn’t have seen much anyway; a cloud came and enveloped the whole mountain range until we were well into our descent.)

Happiness.

Leading up to the peak, though, in the darkness, it was cool, quiet, and serene. The forest critters were all still nestled in their beds.

Every now and then I’d remember that behind me (I was following Mark) was absolute darkness, and then I’d remember that serial killers lived and thrived in absolute darkness; filling me with terror and dread for just a quick second.

A sunrise hike that starts in the darkest part of the night is the adult version of my childhood night walk at camp. Maybe that experience is what nurtured an adventure streak in me. Regardless, walking in the dark, not knowing what’s out there, is just so creepy cool.

As long as you stay clear of the serial killers.

The April Fool is me

This is an embarrassing moment for me.

I’m going to be open and exposed.

Raw and SEEN.

This is a story I can tell now that there are at least a dozen years behind me and a most unfortunate situation. But it still makes me cringe a thousand cringes. And ask myself, ”Stace, did you really??”

”I mean, REALLY??”

Long ago and far away in 2006, little baby Stacie was in a vulnerable place.

New job, new town, new STATE. I had moved to New York at the end of 2004 after graduating from college in Indiana and was completely unfamiliar with my surroundings. My first year and half involved bouncing from job to job to find the one.

In February of ’06 I found a job, I didn’t know yet that it was the one, and set to work (no pun intended) getting to know my role and my coworkers. It was my first foray in politics; I worked for a New York State Senator who would grow to prominence in our corner of the state.

In this new town, there was a local weekly publication called The Chronicle; it was a no-spin newspaper that covered exactly what I wanted to know about this whole new world in front of me. The Chronicle told me who was buying the empty building downtown and when the local hockey team was playing next.

And I really felt like I could trust what I read.

Until April 1st.

That very first April 1st.

The Chronicle publishes an April Fools edition of their paper that, on the front page only, brings the most nearly-possible, yet totally absurd ideas to life with pictures and ”interviews” and thorough reporting. Because it is a weekly paper published on Thursdays only, the April Fools edition didn’t always fall on April 1st. On March 31st you could find yourself with a fresh-off-the-press copy, completely unaware.

An old, 2014 front page

Enter Stace.

Literally. Let’s watch as she enters her regular coffee shop down the street from the office. Watch as she orders her drink and peruses the front page of the most recent Chronicle. It’s around April 1st, but Stacie is a grown-ass-adult and no longer on the lookout for pranksters and bullies itchin’ for a good gag.

A title catches her eye.

DEC to let beavers rebuild Hadlock Dam

Well, that’s interesting. She thinks.

Not that long ago the Hadlock Dam in a neighboring town broke down and drained Hadlock Pond. The pond is in her boss’s district and an issue she knew her coworkers were heavily involved in.

I mean, we’re talking files inches thick of correspondence.

(Side note: DEC is the Department of Environmental Conservation.)

A pressing, timely issue.

One she was sure her coworkers would be interested to know if there were alternative proposals floating around out there!

She reads.

“Beavers are nature’s engineers.”

Of course they are!

”The plan would allow the beavers to naturally build their own timber dam… crews would fill in cracks with cement…check for structural soundness…”

Ok. Brilliant.

Friends, I ran. Not walked. Ran. To my office.

I burst in the door.

I yelled to my co-workers, ”THEY’RE GOING TO LET BEAVERS REBUILD THE DAM!!”

“BEAVERS!”

Ala: “THEY’VE LANDED ON THE MOON!!”

I was full of awe and excitement! I explained the complexities, the engineering involved.

I rationalized the plan. Out loud.

The plan to let beavers build a fully functional dam that livelihoods depended on.

And then….

I heard nothing.

Not a peep.

**Cringe**

No excitement, no questions, no response.

I thought nothing of it, until One. Year. Later. when I read the 2007 April Fools edition. Me, not-so-new to this world, recognized the absurdity and then…

Extreme camera zoom. Record screech. Eyes. Wide. Open in realization.

First realization: I believed a state agency that is full of highly qualified professionals was going to let beavers, BEAVERS, rebuild a dam. A DAM for crying out loud!

Second realization: I shouted this, SHOUTED, from the freakin’ rooftops to people I barely knew.

**Long pause while I just crawl under this table here**

I’m glad I can’t actually see you roll your eyes.

Enjoy my pain, ya sickos.

Thinkin’ spring, but it’s still so cold!

My first memories of spring were of flowers and sunshine and walking barefoot in my backyard.

Sundresses and strappy sandals.

My sisters flanking me in our (always) matching Easter dresses

It was spring before it was officially spring.

That’s because I grew up in Southern California. Life may not have been carefree or safe, but it was WARM.

Cousins! Probably December, j/k

Those days are lonnnnnng behind me and so so far away, literally. Now in the upperright, opposite coast we see spring on the calendar and then count two more months before the ground thaws enough to dig in our gardens.

My first spring away from the West Coast I didn’t understand why it wasn’t warm during my ”spring” break. ”But….it’s SPRING.” I could not wrap my baby brain around the calendar not matching the weather.

And now my middle-ish aged brain still struggles as we watch the daylight grow longer while the snow falls harder. But…it’s SPRING!

BUT…

It’s SPRING!! Which means day by day we get closer to those first daffodils poking through. Closer to the first buds on trees and shrubs. Closer to green grass and baby birds!

My dad said the same thing every winter after we left California.

He’d say, ”remember when all of this was GREEN?!” And we’d laugh because of course we did and if we didn’t laugh we’d cry the frozen little tears of southerners whose blood was too thin.

One summer he said, “remember when all of this was WHITE?!” and then we killed him.

I kid. We loved the winter in those early years. It brought snow days and snow men and sledding and snowball fights and those perfect naps of exhausted babes freshly warmed by dry clothes.

But there is just something so encouraging about the growth and rebirth of spring. Even in California we watched the old die and the new grow in it’s place. Now the effect is so much BIGGER as it’s a much BIGGER extreme from the below zero temps in winter to a perfect 60 degree spring day. But it’s also a BIGGER struggle as we anticipate the coming of those warmer days.

Hence this post. I’m reminding myself that Spring. Will. Come.

It always does, Stace.

And in the meantime, switch out those winter decorations for spring. Shop for the flower seeds you want to plant in May.

Maybe pick out a bright pink yarn for that spring sweater you’ve wanted to knit for yourself. You know, because even when it’s warm out here it’s never really WARM.

Lol.